Page 67 - ThePhoenix1992-93

December 3, 1992,Pa~~11 Editorial: Administratium is Inert By GRETA POWELL chemically because it seems to SlaffWriu, impede every reaction in which Shortly after the 1992 Presi- it takes part dential election, the heaviest el- According to Dr. Jerry ement known to science was Langour, one of the discoverers discovered at the Westminster of the element, a very small Post-Secondary School Chem- amount of Administratium istry Laboratory. made one reaction which nor- The element, tentatively mally takes less than a second named Administratium (Ad) take over four days to reach has no protons or electrons, thus completion. it has atomic number O. It does, Administratium has a half- however, have 1 neutron, 75 as- life of approximately four years, sociate neutrons, 125 deputy as- at which time it does not actu- sociate neutrons, and III assis- aUy decay. Instead, it under- tant deputy associate neutrons. goes an internal reorganization This gives it an atomic mass in which associates to the neu- of 312. The 312 particles are tron, deputy associates to the Campus Security Forces held together in the nucleus by neutron, and assistant deputy a force that involves the con- associates to the neutron all ex- Lead Militant Take-Over tinuous exchange of meson-like change places. called memons. particles Some preliminary studies it has no electrons, Since mass increases after Admtntstrattum is inert. Never- have indicated that the atomic actually By PETER WlDTE first. according to general man- hibited. Viclaters will be sub- R'p