Page 53 - ThePhoenix1984-85

November IS, 1984lWestem Maryland CollegeIPage 5 60 seconds on camp-_u_s_ _Sleven Rossman _ Should Greeks be forced to One shoe on host alcohol related events in one shoe off' Decker? There are three things I never "No." discuss in public: Sex, reli- "Do you run in competi- gion and running. The first tions?" two I rarely mention in order "No." to hide my ignorance. As for "Well? Why DO you run?" running, my knowledge on "To pace your mother," Dad this topic is staggering. A replied. joke I told in mixed company My mother's position is one time nearly created an more understandable. She international incident. Even enters the races to get the so, anyone who watched the free r-stnrts. To date, Mom Summer Olympics· knows that owns 525 T-shirts--a Guineas running is the most boring World Book record. The sport known to humankind. WMC Frostbite races are her Except maybe snorkeling. favorite events. One year they gave out scarves, the next Running can be dangerous. year, a pair \ of gloves. Last r 'speak from experience. In year, my mother got a green my early adolescent years, it and yellow winter hat with a I think it stinks be- I don't like it because It's a good idea be- was called Track and Field. green porn-porn on top. If this cause they are forc- we have clubrooms cause it brings all of Nearing the final lap of a one keeps up, Mom may never mile run, my sneaker fell off, have to shop for clothes ing people to leave and don't get to use the people and differ- causing a five man collision. I again. campus to find other them. ent organizations to- finished the race with one With the advent of triathlons, shoe on and one shoe off and one must be a good swim- parties. gether. STILL came in last place. So I mer, bicyclist and runner, all Renee Dietz Matthew Hardesty Jenny Provost was told to "go for the hur- in one. My neiqhborhood a compassionate Junior Junior Junior dles"--even though I had boasts of epectausts. One never jumped a hurdle in my group Student sinks Columbus' salad boat life. I came in second. Visions neighbor seems 'to be a becoming normal married man with five of the world's greatest hurdler were shat- children in college and a two Editor, We've all heard how very apple slices, surrounded by tared, when I learned that I car gargage. He holds one In response to the "Be hard the cafeteria tries to decorative greens (not 10 was second out of only two ideal very close to his heart.. Grateful you have toad" please us with appetizing mention the "attractive" marl- entrants. The other guy had a He believes in a personalized wooden leg. bicycle seat which molds to letter ,I have a few com- meals. Time and time again chino cherriesl). Granted, it is ments to make. The author school officials have an- appealing to the eye. How- My tinal attempt at this the shape of one's buttocks. I, for one, can not attest to his stated, "there are one billion nounced that the dining hall ever, it is even more appeal- undernourished people in the "lost money this year". I have ing to the pocket when money dubious sport came during claim, being that his bike seat is fairly well hidden when my freshman year. I bought world today." I am sorry to a few suggestions in order to ....is used for the purchase of receive such sad news. Per- save money: better food. eighty dollars worth of running he is in the sitting position. When my mother decided to gear to prepare me for my haps one day when I can Maybe we are looking a adventure. The coach told us afford something aside from Rule #1: Don't put the salad "gift" horse in the mouth by to "Run, run RUN." So I ran buy a new bike and the latest in bikewear, I knew that our tuition, I'll make my contribu- bar in a boat on Columbus complaining. Nevertheless, tion to UNICEF, a very worthy Day. Half of us aren't tall my money for food is already for two straight hours, and neighbor, the Bike Man, was sprained the reason. You should see pulled and every organization. enough to see inside this out of my hands, and it is 100 muscle in my body known to the "bike pants" they wear. However, in the mean time I obstacle. Put our money into late for me to consider giving am forced to pay $1450 a food, not around it. it to a. needy family in Zim- the medical profession. This Bike pants are the most sex- pieces of ually stimulating proves how humiliating and year for food I do not like. It's Rule #2: Don't elaborate on babwe . I feel my investment senseless running can be. clothing I have ever seen. very frustrating to be ready the aesthetic value of the in the cafeteria gives me the This is adult behavior? for a good meal and discover salad bar with creativ- right to say how it is spent Another neighbor is an in- that once again, I have to eat ity;carved cucumbers, grape* Who introduced me to the surance salesman. At night, tuna fish for dinner. fruit slices, orange slices, and Reenie Kilroy sport? Who bought me' the: jogging clothes? From where he is seen running around the block, throwing stacksof pa- Librarian refutes columnist do I gain such knowledge? pers on the lawns yelling "The Meet my parents, the runners. race sheets are coming! The Side by side, in all kinds of Editor, use to students, nor the ar- items identified in the article). weather, day or night, up and race sheets are coming!" A Mexican family misinterpreted any- anytime, down hills, Earlier in the semester I chives which also fit into this We are - but our first priori- his cry, thinking he was an wrote to the Phoenix, request- category. (I must add here ties are supportive and ade- where, they are seen running immigration official who their sweet little Nike sneakers ing that a staff member be that we are in the process of quate facilities, collection and wanted quotas. His latest plan assigned to the library to preservation and restoration services. off. is to rent a helicopter to serve as a liaison .and re- activities as time, money and Honestly - we do care! They are kind, sensitive, "spread the Word" more effi- porter. For whatever reason, I manpower permit.) Instead, Why not support us - use a rational people who are ad- cently. The community is received no response to my our major concern is to pro- positive approach - instead mitted runaholics. But if their trying to stop him. request. Such an action' vide the college students and of trying to humiliate us - a intentions are admirable, their would have prevented an arti-' staff with more adequate facil- negative, destructive ap- motives for running are These people, my parents, cia with so many inaccuracies ities, a larger and more cur- proach? Why not communi- slightly skewed. my neighbors, are not just and misconceptions from rent conectton of books, cate directly with us to middle-aged, middle class being printed. periodicals and other media ascertain facts, to identify "I left your mother in the folks putting their children We, the library staff, would (a high-dollar item), and more what's happening in the li- dust the other day," said Dad. through college. They are not relish the support of students effective and extensive .:ierv- brary that is of special interest "She has stamina, but she's just harmless athletes who as we are in the process of ices. : to the campus comminity, to slow. I left her right in the happen to run for exe~cise working on plans for major That is not to say we aren't build a link between students dust, but don', tell your and enjoyment. They are rev- renovations in the library. The concerned with fragile books, and the library? We are willing mother I said that." olutionaries! If there is one real concerns we have are not archives and archival manu- - what about you? "But why do you do it?" I thing I have learned, however with the collections which are scripts, the archivist taking asked. "Do you improve your it is this: locked in cases because of courses to improve her skills, Dr. Margaret Denman-West There is no stopping them. time?" their age and special limited and the record collection (all Director of Public Services L__ ~ --,