Page 6 - TheGoldBug1943-44

PAGE TWO The Gold Bug. Watem Maryland Cellege, Wutmituter, Md., November 4, 1943 • Massie Presents ---~ • Ode To ------ The Gold Brick A Dying Gold~sh reach should exceed his grasp or what's a heaven -Gue.t,C.detW.lterWe.t. We See A Goal Worth Reaching ----By L. Wallenstein~ for?" W:;k,::;,;~;:'o~hc'::,,~:~;~'::;~h~'::;And Work Cheerfully Toward- It ---eodd dJ~ P-,"'" Ah, my little fish, you are dying. It Cadet, we'd like with this issue to The ageless practice of griping is one of the is plain to see, that your life is eb- bing fast away. It is so soon for you present a picture of Johnny's "day" privileges of the American citizen. We, here on The Answer To A Question to die. I have only just brought you 'of several months ago, back in an in- the campus, also take advantage of this universal We have been asked during the past week to into my humble little room. How ~;;~~ aOU!:~v:~usB::~!~U~f~~:aos~ practice. The importance of student morale can- explain why we have no gossip in the Gold Bug; can you die? You are so very young. the joker who wrote that tune must not be overestimated. why we maintain a literary air instead of one At least you look young because you are so little. have hadl) This being true, why do we continue to find more appealing to the students . .No Life Guarantee • '~~o~e~~~t~vi~~~'~:'~lwake Johnny fault with unavoidable inconveniences prevalent We blush to think that such questions should be Perhaps you are really very old. up. In movies about army life this not only on the Hill, but in America as a whole'! asked, but, in keeping with the policy stated in The salesgirl in Woolworth's did »ot is done, romantically enough, by a Partial absorption and understanding of world the beginning of our year, we shall endeavor to bother to give me even an estimate of bugler. Do not be misled; actually conditions should enable us to shed our opaque properly acknowledge all student criticism. your age. And no life guarantee the method is this: at 5:15, with cloaks of self-pity, and to don in their stead The Gold Bug is published for the purpose of either! But it just doesn't seem fair Johnny sleeping like the proverbial transparent thinking caps which would reveal the presenting news to people on and off campus who to me. Because of you I sacrificed six my dinner. through walked I ~~:;~ :~:a;,os;o:san:~:l' t~~cac~!p~:; opportunities that this institution affords. are interested in the affairs of Western Maryland blocks of pouring rain, just to make fixe siren starts, the platoon aer- A renaissance of scholastic feeling should not College and its personnel. you a part of my life. Fish and col- geant's whistle blasts, the lights go necessitate the introduction of coercive force into It is intended that at all times, the Gold Bug lege dormitories seem to have some- on, Johnny's bunkmate shrieks in nb- the student body. The Western Maryland student will print the opinions of individuals on matters thing in common. ject terror, Johnny catapults out of has serious responsibilities, whether he realizes of import if they are written for the purpose of Oh, do not fain to think for one unifying the students in a greater appreciation of tiny minute that I even dreamed of ~~Ot~~f:rfe~~n~el:~:' ~~~ai::sd~; ~:~ them or not. He has been endowed by his parents making you a par! of some cruel un- or his government with a trust, and it is his per- College Hill and the traditions that belong to our begun! dernourtshed college boy's diet, dear Roughly ten seconds later, ten ser- sonal duty not to betray that trust. I Alma Mater. little fish. No, I had no such nefar- geants and twenty-seven corporals Therefore, every student should resolve to Entertainment is a minor department of the I ious intentions. I only wanted to let unite in more efficiently spasmodic adopt a more cheerful attitude toward his duties, newspaper, for we do not uphold as ideal, the yel- you share some of the excitement of whistle-blowing, and Johnny falls out and to accompany that attitude with a sincere re- low press. VIe do, however, intend to provide en- being part of a girls' dorm. with the rest of the company. After tertainment for those people who are interested .Fish Eye View the First Sergeant has determined to solve to do no less than his best. in seeing "news and views" expressed in an origi- his satisfaction that each platoon is Such naive practices as ignoring studies, abus- Little fish, can you even imagine how "awpresnacountafawp?", J. C. romps ing privileges, and instigating any form of foul nal and intriguing style. many things happen in such an estab- oft' to the first of the day's meals. play can in no case be considered collegiate. These We refuse to intentionally print anything that lishment. No, I doubt if you ever ."Around The Breakfast Table" offenses merely prove that a person is not capable could bring harm to Western Maryland College, really contemplated it. I will try to Jokingly called "breakfast", this or to any related person. . give you a fish eye view, although not interlude consists of juiceless grape- of taking his position in a cultured adult world. Keeping these things in mind, we see no place being a member of the illustrious fruit, yokeless eggs no self-respect- One of the most difficult tasks ever undertaken fish family will probably hinder me ing hen would claim, cereal of unin- by man is that of successfully convincing youth for jokes, for they can be found in any of the somewhat. If I should take your lit- teresting color and questionable an- on a given subject. Youth invariably comes back nickel magazines of the stevedores. tle bowl from its hook on the wail cestry, and a sulfuric beverage sac- with the reply that experience is the best teacher. Gossip columns rule themselves out by virtue of and let you look down the halls for rilegiously specified on G. I. menus as the fact that they never did good for anyone, and a moment I think your pop. eyes coffee. Having hurdled this morale- What a pleasure it would be to grasp the culprit they have been known to smudge the otherwise would protrude to an even greater- de- breaker, Johnny sprints back, makes who set forth that warped philosophy. If one gree. 'his bed in twelve seconds, and falls places his faith so completely in that theory that spotless reputations of many. You would see dozens of girls rush- out again, six seconds late for forma- he tries to learn only by experience, he may fall In other words we want the Gold Bug to be a ing down the halls, probably all of tion. without an accomplishment to his credit. student publication for college students; not a them with the same object-to use For the next two hours, the platoon It would be well for each student in war time to handbill for adolescents. . the one and only shower which doubt- sergeant (a former heavyweight ---'It._ Cd;to. lessly will have no hot water anyway, wrestler and weight-lifter) gives remember what Browning said, "Ah, but a man's because some thoughtless individual Johnny and his pals calisthenics and or freshman has let it run all over close-order drill*.'" the latter intended the floor in such a manner that will to finish off those who might survive Campus Personality Smith ruin your fuzzy slippers if you dare go in. the former. .How To Loaf Can't you just hear the gentle Johnny, whose mother fed him cod pitter-patter of girlish feet, thunder- liver oil' til he was eighteen, comes ing softly down the corridors at the thru both with nothing more serious By Lucinda Holloway, Feature Editor year she played a leading role in the tiona dealing with aviation. No mat- ringitJ.g of a telephone, and screaming because than fallen arches and deflated spir- If anyone ever doubts that any good junior play, "The Tragic Christen- ter where she may be or what she wild screams of delight call from Los it isn't a long distance its. The two hours before lunch are ing" and was in the cast of "Stage be doing, Margaret Ann Smith then spent in loafing around on the thing could come out of the Eastern Door." may Angeles or Singapore, although they will very likely go on loving life and bayonet close combat course, holding Shore, he would cease to doubt once really didn't expect one anyway. If an eleven pound rifle at arm's length he met the bonny president of the • Fourth Year With SGA wanting to live life to the full. (Cont. on page 4, col. 2) while loafing. Women's Student Government Asso- She is serving on the SGA for the After lunch, (we won't go into that, ciation. fourth year. Oh yes, she is also vice- since it's breakfast only they fry the There's nothing ordinary about president of Phi Alpha Mu sorority. From Freshmen To Women cereal) during which a torrential Margaret Ann except the Smith. Even ("Smitty's" capacity and energy rain has started, the company falls that has been changed to an affection- don't stop there, but we're running, out with full packs, gas musks, and ate "Smitty". short of positions.) rifles, for a short forced march to the Holding high positions in student bivouac urea."'''''''' life is no new thing for "Smitty". The Freshmen-Heaven Help Them! Also a good broad shoulder to weep High When a student of Washington (Cont. on page 4, col. 4) The above ejaculation is really a on? School (Princess Anne, Maryland), she was the president of her fresh- prayer for the tenderfoots (or does The Women-God Bless Them THE GOLD BUe; man and sophomore classes. She was one say tenderfeet?) and not an ex- losophy 301 may diverge from their- of phi- Any day now the students of pression derision. had You've also a member of the student govern- Official "t\1denl newspaper of 'YMt"rn Mary ment during all four years. She was enough of that look which says, "Who discussion of "Is there a God?" and land College, published "emj·monthly. on O. K. then, and she is super now. are these coming to the sacrifice?" focus their collected brain power on Thursday, during October. November. Jan" I suppose I could write you a little ary, February. Much. and April. and monthly .GeLs Around the vital question: "Can a woman be during September. December. and May. En· essay on "What I Would Do If I lered u •• cond c\H.a matter at 'Ve.lmin.\er Before the fall of 1940, Margaret 'Vere a Freshman Again", but I have a philosopher?" The presence of only Pool office. under the Aca. 01 March. 3. 1879 Am} had never seen weetem Mary- four young ladies among the cosmic Jand College Campus. At that me- a feeling that if I were given another thinkers of that group might well Subscription Price $2.00 a Year . chance, I'd make the same fool mis- morable time she came, she saw, and takes again and add some new ones. I raise the question. Bditor-Iu-Chlef.; ...Lillian Jackson, '15 -to quote "Smitty"-"was very bash- could telJ you How to Succeed in Col- • Proving Existence Of Love Managing Editor.. ..Mary V. Webb, '45 ful and didn't know my way around". lcge, but I confess I'm not quite sure 1 would answer the question with News Editor.... .Bob Adams, '45 It wasn't long, however, before she I know what Success is or how one another: "Does ~ woman want to be a Assist. News Editor. __.June Vogel, '46 caught on and got around in a big gets it. I've been here only two years. philosopher?" Believe it or not, one Feature Editor ..Lucinda Holloway, '45 way. of the problems of philosophy is: Sports Editor "western Maryland," says this Margaret Ann Smith • College Broadens Ignorance prove the existence of love. Now you Dorothy Rovecamp, '44 popular co-ed, "means all that I hoped I think the idea of a liberal arts know that any woman would laugh at Copy Editor ......Virginin Voorhees, '46 it would mean, and a lot more." Even if you knew nothing of her college is to make one know that he that. Women have the good sense to Cadet Editorial Council: "Smitty" has com-eto mean a great long train of student activities, you knows almost nothing at aU. You stick to the obvious and concrete. In Martin Burrus, Stuart Massie, deal to Western Maryland, too. In could see at first meeting that "Smit- may know that already. Very good, fact, my philosophy textbook (bor- Ernest Morgan, Francis Snyder, her sophomore year she was vice- ty" deserved that highest of student but here you will be introduced to rowed from a young lady) bears on David Strand. president of 11eTclass and a member titles-"one swell girl". Her ready many other branches of knowledge its title page this comment, "Gee, Business Manager of the May Court. In her junio~ smile and friendly "Hi there" can jibout which you will know less and that's a good looking skirt." Dennis Blizzard, '45 make any pessimist believe that it less as time goes by. You will gain, A woman is a law unto herself: at Circulation Manager t!J.. qeit.uut e really is a beautiful morning. as it were, a perspective of your ig- any rate, she's certainly a caution. Barbara Brower, '46 CO "Smitty" loves horseback riding, norance. Doesn't all this talk make Students in the stories may talk into Contributors: Betty Waits, Janet Oh, glory to God and praise to the and she can even joke about the time you feel uncomfortable? That's right; the night Baugher, Marianna Murray, Jean An- Lord, in her sophomore year when she fell glory in your meekness while you Of Life and Death, of God and Truth, derson, Shirley Jones, Mary Davis, I've struck the C-major, the common off a horse and gained a skinned face, have the chance. The time will come and Why Men Fight; Winifred Shauck, Frank Middleton, chord. black eyes, and swollen Jips that when you will have to take up the up- But all the co-eds.1 know put such Margaret Fredrich, Catherine Ward, Not with the dullest nor yet with the looked like an illustration from "Life perclassmen's burden, the burden of cosmic chat to naught Irma Young, Nevin Lindsay, Theo. great, with the Ubangi". Her other loves trying to pretend that you know With How to Find Them, How to Jones, Jim Green, Faithe Berger, I'll have a persective ,at any rate. include movies, walking in the rain, something. Catch Them, How to Keep Them Margery Zink, Lee Wallenstein, Jan- Always a bridesmaid, never a bride; steaks with French fries, Ocean City, After all, a freshman is merely the Caught. ice McKinley, Henry Lamadrid, Cadet I'm filled with hope, though not with and the Eastern Shore. only student who has the right to Franklin P I' a tor, Cadet Harvey pride. .Mind In The Air know as little as most of the other Note: Ydobon was an ancient phil- Sml!llwood, Cadet Walter West, Shir- Always in purgatory, never in bliss, Her major is sociology. Plans for students know. Therefore: osopher who lived in the country of ". ley Gaver, Doris Knowles, Mindelle But I might be in lower worlds than her future are not definite, but she is What shall I give you but courage to Erehwon. He was noted for his Seltzer. this. interes1;ed in social work and~ posi- keep on? Cont. on pa, 4, col. 4)