Page 23 - Phoenix1998-99

COMMENTARY Thursday, October I, 1998 - Page 7 Reality: First Weeks at Western Maryland College Two of my new-found acquain- to a surreal world; it was real. One Ron Mojica suggests a we all envisioned. tances .and I were sitting on the major problem, however ... I had no way to cope with thefirst lege experience the whole college is becoming routine. Familiar faces Throughout benches in front of Rouzer on the piece of paper to back me up. preparation process, we too were flock to the same classes which second night of orientation when What was it that made me semi- days of college life. given duties to keep in mind during were once a chore to find. Time one shared a story about an esca- nauseous that evening? Was it fear for studying fits well in the day and pade she pad taken through the of coming late for the first class? forced mingling is always an awk- the whole pleas adjustment period. too In· parties never leave freshman hang- cessant of not partying psychedelic world. -A friend told Of not making friends? Of just not ward situation. much came from parents, excelling ing on a Friday night. Even the her that at some point in the being up to par with the old high Also, most of us are accus- in academics from past teachers, dorms get cleaned once in a while. about trans- remarks Currently, evening, amidst all the floating school glory days? Ithink the knot tomed to the luxuries which we and trying to keep schmaltzy emo- ferring and dropping out come few bubbles, flashing lights, and other that was twisting itself in my stom- take for granted while living at tional ties with significant others and far between among the mem- sorts of audio-visual stimuli, she ach was a combination of those home. Home-cooked meals were left behind or parted in different bers of the freshman class and a would lose touch with reality. three questions and a whole list of just in the next room. Air condi- ways. sense of comfort and camaraderie She was .told not to worry, others which Ihaven't had to worry tioning breezed through the vents. Yes, these would be meaningful though, if she took a special pre- about for the last four years of my Attaining privacy was as easy as promises to keep, but Ithink being has intertwined itself among the strangers. former ...the college did well in planning the whole orientation with the hopes of people interacting and making new acquaintances. Maybe I just hold a firm conviction that forced mingling is always an awkward situation. caution- writing the word "reality" life. locking the bedroom door. on a piece of paper and referring Maybe it was simply having to Now it is an achievement to able to locate a bathroom or just f think that I can justly speak finding the right parties to go to take to it when needed. This would adapt to my new environment. simply identify the food in Gla~. precedence. on behalf of my fellow classmates prove the fact that she was coher- Why have we been ripped out Multiple fans merely circulate the One of the best pieces of advice when saying that nothing will ever ent that evening and would even- from comfort zones and forced to hot, stale air in the dorms. Most r received was just to give it time. replace the familiarity of home and tually drift back (Q sobriety. attend a succession of uncomfort- of ail, rooms are no longer your Friends, family, and I knew that ad- that the good feeling towards cam- As she told this to me, r looked able ice breakers, peer mentor ses- own but are shared with one per- justment wouldn't come instantly pus life may change to boredom or at my new surroundings. I saw stons, hours of OCfAA, and sexual son, and in some cases two, with but would arrive gradually. weariness at anytime. time and patience, With some imposing buildings, paths leading assault programs? all their belongings as well. A few hours in a new setting however, the dreaded newness of to yet unknown comers of the cam- Nol that they were completely Humor often carries a great seemed like weeks and, by the third the campus has dissipated and, as pus, and a slew of strangers who I pointless, the college did well in deal of sincerity, and a lot of jokes day, the campus stilt did not feel like consolation, I'm relieved by the hoped shared the same trepidations planning the whole orientation with were exchanged about transferring home. fact that during the next four years, I harbored at the time. the hopes of people interacting and to a different school or quitting al- I'm glad, however, that I was the help of a piece of paper with Then I thought to myself that making neyo' acquaintances. Maybe together. The present wasn't quite this wasn't a mere seven hour trip I just hold a firm conviction that up to the mental image of the col- proven wrong. As the sixth week "reality" inscribed on it will not be necessary. the schedule of school approaches, Rape: What Can You do to Stay Safe? It takes an understanding and which could arise for students con- Lisa van Auken lends people, or go into the closest build- raped, been If you you loving individual to counsel a rape cerning rape; however, probably some practical advice ing to get away from the pursuer. have choices. have Call Campus Safety victim. due to time constraints, the presen- about rape prevention. Carrying your keys in your or the Sexual Assault lnfonnation While the effects of violent tation did not address the issues of hand instead of your book bag or crime are traumatic and often last- what actions should be taken imme- der the category of date rape or purse also reduces the time you Team. What you should not do, espe- ing throughout life, counselors at diately after being raped and what acquaintance rape. While in- spend trying to open the door, mak- cially if you are planning on report- WMC are brave enough to help can be done to prevent it from hap- stances of rape by a stranger are ing you able to get inside ing the incident, is shower, brush people through crises when rape pening in the first place. significantly less, the damage is with less hassle. you teeth, douche, or change your does occur. They give victims the Rape starts with the rapist, not just as harmful. There are mea- If you do feel you are being fol- clothes. Get medical attention comfort and the advice that they the victim. It is never okay to force sures that should be taken to re- lowed, let the person who follows quickly. If you are concerned that need to find the absolution that sex on anyone else, male or female. you know thai you are suspicious you are pregnant or that you have makes it possible to go on with liv- "No" means no, and even if the Rape starts with the of him or her. Don't ignore the contracted an STD, the hospital can ing. potential rapist interprets "no" as problem and hope it will go away help. These selfless individuals are "yes," that person could face crimi- rapist, not the because, sometimes, it is by intimi- Most of all, remember that it is trained to help rape victims work nat charges. victim. It is never dating victims before the attack that not the victim's fault that he or she through their problems without As the person choosing to ab- an assailant can gain the necessary was raped. There are rape crisis using trite and ineffective expres- stain from having sex. the key is to okay to force sex on window for committing the crime. lines to call, to help you deal with sions like, "It's all going to be be assertive. Don't consider yourself a vic- okay." Saying "no" and then submitting anyone else, male or tim, but consider yourself on the of- crisis. Consider carrying one of This is because rape is not okay. to sex can make the partner think. female. fense. Do whatever you have to these phone numbers with you. the best way to Just remember, This year freshman attending ori- that sexual contact was desired by do to remain safe. Don't be afraid avoid being raped is to stay out of entation learned from a dramatic both parties, and, therefore, it is not duce the risk of being raped. to make a scene. Sometimes, draw- potentially dangerous situations film. presented by the Sexual As- rape. Be clear about your intentions Walking with someone else is ing attention to your situation, no and make your intentions clear. and be committed to what you say, one of the biggest ways to remain matter how small or large the Most of all, so there is no question as to whether safe, especially late at night. While amount of suspicion you bear, will If you must walk remember that it is or not "no" means "yes." of- those. trips across campus at mid- save your life. being raped, alone, consider In the role of the potential night are often unavoidable, don't If you find yourself not the victim's fault fender, do not interpret what the feel embarrassed to ask a friend or you-must do what you have to do in carrying pepper person is saying. Take his or her someone at the campus safety of- your specific situation. Sometimes that he or she was word for what it is. If there is a fice to escort you back to your fighting back will save you, but spray and learning raped. question as to whether that person's or donn. If you must walk alone, con- sometimes complying will. Some- self-defense. is impaired judgment by drugs 'alcohol, then wait. sider carrying pepper spray and times, it is best to let the criminal who has see you as a human being The best way to save yourself sault Information Team, that rape Isn't it better to be patient, then learning self-defense. Stick to well a family, mid-terms, talents, and the trouble of being charged with is unacceptable under all circum- to face criminal charges? The point lit areas, and stay away from the other traits that convey personality, stances. The topic of the hour long is this: if you're unsure, don't do it. shadows around buildings. while at others it is is best to not date rape is: if you're not sure, presentation was generally the Also, intoxication does not jus- Most importantly, go with your say anything at all. don't do it. Rape hurts people, but definition of rape, specifically date tify forcing sex on anyone else. The instincts, and be alert at all times. In the situation of rape, you must it can often be avoided with the rape. failure to use judgment due to con- If you suspect that someone is fol- be the judge of the best method of right precautions. Play it safe. Since 67% of rapes are commit- sumption of alcohol is not an ex- lowing you, or if you see someone ted by a person the victim knows cuse for hurting someone you might suspicious, don't hesitate to take dealing with it, but remember, that Some of the information in this whatever your it was the choice, in some way, the discussion cov- care about. action. Trust how you feel. Go best decision you were capable of article was found at: ered the more probable scenarios Of course, not all rapes fit un- back to where you were. find other making at the time. dr(!wski.andrew.cmu.edulrapel whattodo.html