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Volume CVVXIII Number 7,632,901 April 1, 2001 SGA plods forward are." When asked why individual the policy changed. For instance, Dean Mowbray attended this girls have beenrequired to pay the he suggested that Kurt Linkoff week's S.G.A. meeting for the same fines as entire fraternities write reviews of hair salons rather purpose of answering questions for alcohol violations, Dean then records, and that the related to the present alcohol Mowbray responded, "I just don't cheerleadersget shorter skirts. policy, which is being attacked by like girls, I think it was a girl who Another measure taken at this the student's of W.M.C. The mugged me in HawaiI." T. Lee meeting was initiated by Adam meeting was extremely beneficial Maxwell, an S.G.A. representative Wright, who chairs a newly for both the students and the ad- then made a motion to kick Hawaii created subcommittee probIng out of the U.S. and any federal whether the rumour that the Green money previously alloted to that Terror and DeanMowbray are one The Dean, for example, stated state be transferred to WWMC. and the same. Adam quoted, clearly that "kegs are not allowed When asked about the possible "Have you ever seen them in the residence halls un(ler any return of open section parties, the together?" circumstances, except when they Deanwas cut off in his responseby Teresa Baker, who stated, "I've Mike Davis, chairman of the never been to one, so no one here action committee reported on Or. has any business discussing it in John's decline to attend an S.G.A. my presence." Mike Kelly, meeting, Mike stated "Every time aggravated by Miss -Baker's in· I called him he just said 'Hi, I'm terruption, announced "I'm going Dr. John, is it parent's day yet?" to publish that Teresa Baker is the Mike also reported that the illegitimate child of Irene Young committee is sending out a and White Fang in the next SGA questionnaire to find out why no newsletter. I'll print it! I'll print students sent in questions to be anything!" published in the questionnaire he wanted to put out but didn't because he ~idn't have any questlon~toask. -Ashford delivers a commanding Alumni Hall. You're Out Nancy Menefee great players were stili around," By far the college's most talked offered Hisfory Professor Cor- about speaker this year was the nelius "Jolten Joe" Darcy. "But famous umpire. Emmett Ash- he never mentioned it." ford. Scrtrnshaw would like to ac- I was tipped off to the story by a cuse the lecture Concert Cern- comment written on a poster mtttee and the SGA of booking a suggesting we cover the lecture. speaker who is obviously The comment stated that "there unresponsive to what his wasn't a dead moment in the audienceswant. As final proof we lecture." raise the question: how come the When I tried to find'out what LCe never put up their posters the man had to say. I was told saying "what did you think of that the lecture had been can- Emmett Ashford?" Were they celled. I was too smart to be afraid student enthusiasm died? fooled by tnet.tt was probably a Of all the people we talked to, story made up by our arch-r-ivets, Scrimshaw found only two people the National Enquirer. No doubt, who had anything positive to say. the Enquirer, still burned up over One LCC member defendedtheir how we outscooped them on the choice saying, "At least he didn't cohabitation and Phi Delt stories talk about hair dryer in the wanted the edge on Emmett jungle." The other was a Ashford. professional medium, Madam A quick check of Alumni Hall Major.league, who found the made me understand why people lecture "very very interesting, The turnout for last Thursday's SGA meeting was surprisingly strong. President thought they hadn't heard Em- but tiring. t was taking notes Steinmetz was pleased with the evening's debate because "".like hey man, it mett Ashford. A black man, very very fast." covered all the Issues and was really deep.': wearing an umpire's uniform standing against the black curtain on stage at Alumni Hall is not aIways easy to spot. I talked to the campus to find out what they remembered about Mr. Ashford's lecture. "Well, he didn't talk about racism in sports," a BSU member told me in confidence. A baseball player, who wished to remain anonymous, said, that he was disappointed "because I never heard Emmett say a word House 0/ Liquor about strategy." "I wanted him to autography my bubble gum cards. I waited CaIIIIituje Hllllae ~ Carroll Plaza, Westminster around afterwards, but he never 113 W. Main s..: Speciafof the Week showed up," said SGA Assembly Chairman John Hines COLD BEER "At the Forks" COLD BEER "One thing's for sure,'! com. .~ OLD GERMAN & .~ OLD GERMAN BEER mented Dave Cleveland, "he '1.39 a six didn't talk about Ihe Grade fiJ~e"'<>BAVARIAN BEER e-"<> Review Board." $4.99 a case' fiJ~ 12 OZ, cans "The radio station interview . never came off," said lee Check our Easter Wine Specials with this coupon 848·1314 Maxwell, "justa lot of deadair." OFFER EXP. 4/10/80 -, "I was hoping he'd talk-about 848·3466 College ID required baseball in the old days, when the