Page 12 - TheGoldBug1934-35

The Gold Bug, Western Maryland College, Westminster, Md. PAGE TWO THE SP ICE GOt Passing in Review THE SPICE OF LIF'E ance. OF L IF E By BRADY O. BRYSON And what of a difference a whale of weeks A couple Merz ago Charles make! an Ti1nes published in the York Pooch, interesting New article ou the recovery pro- School Daze just Mr. a few baths after becoming sartor- gram. In it he sets forth briefly the School daze! School daze! ia lly impeccable, must have decided to Official student newspaper of Western Maryland College, published on Thursday five chief policies of the President, Dear old welcomed school daze! register for courses. Unfortunately, during the academic year by the students of Western Maryland College, Westminster, gives a summary of the results of each, English and hist'ry and science deep, however, he could make no headway Maryland. Entered as second-class matter at the W estminster Postoffice. Taught to the tune of soft snores and into the Administration Building aud and then suggests the weighty prob- SUBSCRIPTIONPRICE $1.00 A YEAR lems which Roosevelt is facing as he sleep, was literally shooed from the door. ~peeches, quizzes and papers due, Btill dauntless, Pooch declared empha t- resurveys each. The article gives as EDITORIAL STAFF concise a word picture of what the New Time for a moonlit walk with you, ically-"Let them bar me from register- Editor-in-Chief DENNIS J. BROWN, '35 Deal has done and is str-iving for as Chipped beef for breakfast, rice pud- ing, but no man shall bar me from Associate Editors PAUL SCHWEIKER, 35, EDITH FORNEY, '35 may be had anywhere. It is a fine sum- ding, too, knowledge!" News Editors ROBERT BROOKS, '36, FRANCES ELDERDICE, '35 When school daze returns to the hill. And, true to his word, he ventured Copy Editors IDA1fAE RILEY, '36, HAROLDWHITE, '36 mary of what the last eighteen months into psychology class, arousing the at- Sports Editors WILSON NICHOLS, '35, F&ANCES GLYNN, '35 have meant in our economic life. WANTED: tent ion of everyone by his insatiable Feature Edito1'. ROSALIE SILBERSTEIN, '36 In respect to the policy of devalua- Information leading to the recovery curiosity. With distressing inhospital- MAKE·UP STAFF tion of the dollar, it may be said that of A. Cute Pooch, last seen in vicinity it.y the budding psychologists regarded Managing Editor HERBERT STEVENS, '36 the goal of higher prices has been al- of Main Street, Saturday night. Was the intruder not as one of themselves, Assistant Managing Editors 1IANSELL STEVENS, '35, HUGH CHAPMAN, '36 most reached. Prices have increased, unna.tura lly clean and well fed at the but merely us an interesting study of but not to the level which Roosevelt BUSINESS STAFF expected. However, there is considera- time. stimulus and response. The response Business Manager F. KALE MATHIAS, '3'5 alas was anti-climatic, Mr. Biehl Advertis.ing Manager ····· .EDWARD BEAUCHAMP, '36 ble reluctance to give the credit to the A dramatie, tale of an ugly duckling with undue ceremony rose arid escorted Assistant Advertising Managm· ········ .JOHN WARMAN, '37 devaluation program. Corn shortage, was unfolded this week-end before the the visitor from the halls of learning. Ci1'culation MOIIwglfrs THOMAS EVELAND, '36, OLIVE BUTLER, '35 AAA curtailment, NRA wages, and Pooch was last seen on his way down- other factors certainly have played a eyes of interested spectators on the Assistant Circulation Managers great part under the budgetary policy, Hill. On Thursday evening, Mr. POOCll town, a new smile on his face, and a ANDREW RILEY, '36 MARTHA MCCULLOUGH, '37 made 'his debut on the Western Mary- new spring in his step. RALPH LUMAN, '37 ROSALIE GILBERT, '36 millions of dollars have been spent in relief work, 0 that it is impossible to land campus, a debut minus the music. "CLAHSY" ACCENTS FROM NEW REPORTERS see any balance to national income and and roses, but very much plus the need ENGLAND Brady Bryson, '35; Guy Griffen, '36; Kenneth Plummer, '37; Charles Read, '36 ; expenditures in the near future. The of a haircut and bath. Scorned by a Scene: French Class. Elizabeth Byrd, '36; Sally Price, '37; Orpha Pritchard, '35; Jane Roof, '36; PW A, CCC, CW A, and FERA have few dainty damsels who shuddered at Mlle. le Professeur: Ou est M. Camp- Reynolds Simpson, '36; Nicholas Campofreda, '36; Ralph Lambert, '37. sight of him, Mr. Pooch stood dauntless hem Est·il absent I Oh! M. Camp- Helen Stump, '36; Barabelle Blackwell, '37; Margaret James, '35. 'all drained the treasury, in spite of the fact that the Democratic platform of on the threshold of Smith Hall. There bell est mala.de. he remained-unable to speak-but his Millard a "drastic (from Rhode Worthy opinion; Model management; Correct news. 1932 promised expenditures." reduction of warm brown eyes pleading, "Brother, ma'am, Milahd's here! Island): No. There is governmental a bone t" much have been as to appropriated these to can you spare by several young plod- PUNS AND MORE OF 'EM whether question Befriended wisely funds E D I T o R I A L I such organization, as to, whether the ders of the gridiron, Mr. Pooch found Overheard in McKinstry Hull: , ---'. maximum benefit has been received bed and board for the night. Next 1st Stude: "We have to read 'A Mid- from their expenditures. Now 'Wash- Inorning, the pangs of starvation re- summer Night's Dream' out loud, but Exit "Joe College" From the ranks of the collegiate world is disap- ington feels that perhaps it would have moved, Pooch emerged, fresh for the we don't have enough characters." pearing a type of personality that for many years been better if the Red Cross had been triumphs of a new day. And what a 2nd Stude: "I'll be Puck." "I (Stewed): wouldn't 3rd the awaited at served as an excellent reason why parents would not send their sons to put in charge of the money instead of changed of welcome same dainty him damsels! ing the Puck in 'A Midsummer mind be- Night's those hands college. Ludicrous as he is nauseous, "Joe College" is finding it more all these new commissions. Tonsorial skill among the fair maidens Dream', but I'd hate to be the puck on and more difficult to inject his repugnant personality into collegiate As to the industrial policy, even was evidenced at Pooch's next appear- the hockey field!" Roosevelt is asking whether the NRA circles which long since have become disgusted with his insipid type. has gone too f'ar in the matter of price Everyone knows "Joe College", since one of his attributes is his fixing and limitation of production. attempt to make himself the very essence of popular-ity. "Joe" is the This, of course, reveals the doubt which THE MOURNERS' BENCH fellow who wears ridiculously wide trousers, dons a brimless hat on all has clouded his belief in the principles occasions, wisecracks about his ":flames", does the "sugar foot" at the which constitute the very foundations NRA. Statistics military ball, sings the latest torch song while other people are convers- of the activity to be seven do show busi- WE WONDER- THE DRAMA- ness be- cent per ing,' and drinks gin out of the bottle at football games. "J oe" is also low that of last year, even though pay- What is it that Federalsburg has that We present a "thimble" play for your the fellow who, before the depression, made the raccoon coat an integral rolls show a nine per cent increase .. makes the younger inhabitants turn out approval. Scene ] is laid down or gigolettes, as the ~ - part of a college education. But now" Joe" seems to be slowly disap- The AAA, which has limited, pro- to be gigolos Speaking of Federalsburg, case town(~). "Horse", the leading man. may- be ~ pearing in to thin air. duction of certain crops and has paid we notice that absence makes the heart "Here, kitty." In order to understand just why "Joe College" no longer retains millions of dollars ill bounties to farm- grow fonder of someone else, much to (silence) ers, has certainly reached its goal of his former eminence, it is first necessary to realize why he ever appeared increasing the purchasing power of the McN ally's dismay. "Nice kitty." in the college world. Perhaps the dazzling period of world prosperity farmer. But little of this has been ac- Scene II-Senior Dormitory. which followed the Great War may be given the blame for creating this complished by higher prices resulting unusual type of college man. Since" Joe" was given too much money from the artificial scarcity created by WE NOTICE- (A half an hour has elapsed between to spend, he indulged in every sort of frivolous amusement he could crop limitation. The chief increase of That Maudre Willis' new theme song find. For a while he appeared to be a highly entertaining type, but as purchasing power has come to the farm- is "California, Here I Come". The Scenes I and II). the bounty er through payments, which his eccentricities became more pronounced he outlived his amusement means that nothing has been added to young lady was overheard to remark "Horse", the leading man- recently people that "it's value. "J oe College" then became a problem. the total purchasing power in the coun- 'can't have that private a shame affairs around "Where in-**'*: can I hang these love The depression brought a new type of student to the colleges of try. Taxation has simply transferred here without someone butting in." May- clothes ~" America-a type that was intent on securing more than a gaudy ward- this power from urban sections to the be that accounts for the fact that now robe and a series of headaches from four years in college. The advent rural county-receivers. she likes them plain without cinnamon of this new type is the main reason for the gradual disappearance of Finally, the government's policy of sugar. How about it, Jim. WE CONTINUE- credit expansion was supposed to have "J oe College." Instead of talking about the best kind of rum to use created "easy money" for business men, Evidently the boys clown at Navy in a "TQm and Jerry", the students of today would rather converse on so that commercial enterprises would didn't do right by our "Streaky". the Pulitzer Prize play, social conditions in Russia, or the newest Liter- increase and "thereby increase general LITERARY DIGEST- We notice that he is bearing the sign ary Guild selection.. In other words, college men and women are now business activity. This program has "Charles" Moore has been observed of his martyrdom to the cause of (~). ignoring" Joe College" and, in his place, are creating a more interesting definitely been a failure, however, be- lately reading "'1'he Tale of The An- cause records show that commercial cient Mar-iner". "Charley" reports that We have remarked the fact that and worth-while personality-one that turns toward the intellectual losses for the year $167,000,000 less he enjoyed it immensely. iVard-"Terp" to you, has been 're- side of life. than for a corresponding date last year. markably f'auey-f ree so far this year. Although "Joe College" is rapidly disappearing from college Certainly the credit policy has not at- Esh all we can say for him this time. campuses, he is by no means completely out of the picture. Every col- tamed the expansion desired of it. IT IS REPORTED- the have us from Criticisms lege still has its playboys. Idling away their time and energy, these The whole recovery program is un- self-styled elite to reached effect that our the popu- That very critically "J oes" continue to live up to the traditions laid down by their un- der fire, and is being It is difficult sur- lar with "little Stevie" was at the game column does not equal our predecessor, the other children vey ed by its authors. to worthy predecessors. No doubt it will take several more years to put determine just what it has accomplish- the other day. Then, too, there is the "Hazel and Hazelnut." We attribute "J oe" completely out of the picture; but at least college students a few ed, but it may be said fairly definitely Little one down town. While we are this to the fact that we have no "big years ,from now will not have to put up with the artless conversation, that had the program accomplished any • concerned with the Stevens family, it illerthas': in our midst . the offensive dress, and the other disgusting characteristics of a type of unusual amount of good during the last might be interesting to record the fact What with the increased enrollment eighteen months, the effect would have that "big Stevie" has displayed an in- personality that should never have been created. and our outgrowing the little summer been much more noticeable than it has clination toward nocturnal prowls late- house, some worthy youth appreciator been up to date. ly, principally in the vicinity of the thought of the bigger and better pavil- The Forensic Season Having lost a large percent of their membership rear of the Seminary. Iion-hya, strutters-shall we give 'em last year by graduation, the debating teams of We wonder just who has been throw- a sitting vote of thanks? this year are faced with a serious problem-that of securing new mem- If you can't read the handwriting on ing "stones" at the choir. Three for on the beers bers. Although the response to the invitation sent out by the men's the walls these days, you get another A certain young Senio.r R. O. T. C. drum major. More the house that, and like pep and women's debating teams has been fairly successful, there is still a chance next semester. officer has been seen indulging in nu- we'll really go to town at our games. Perhaps great need for new members. -Flapper Fancy. merous cigars. ma·sculinity this .... is a sign of his budding perhaps. The very fact that for the past several years Western Mary land What certain student (we can't say College has had debating teams of which any institution could well be "The authors" are laboring under dif'- just what class as we really don't ficulties tonight. The dirt seems to be know) had his picture taken with near- proud should be impetus enough to secure the cooperation and partici- settling this year. ly every group for the year book ~ He pation of the student body of the college. But, besides this fact, the Housemother: "It's ten o'clock; do Who is the little freshman co·ed who should have to pay extra. benefits to be derived from debating are well worth any time and effort you think you can slay here all night~" has been getting all the rush lately~ seniors in The speech that a student may put into this forensic work. Practice in public Alec: "Well, I'll have to call home She'd better watch her step! Th~ ment have started the work on depart- their speaking, participation in argumentation, and the power to reason and and tell my roommde." mighty have fallen before. Caroline Thanksgiving play, "Minick", which think for oneself are but a fe" of the benefits to be derived. -Purple Parrot. might not like it. will open the "season" here at Western The Debating Council this year hopes to have a debating squad of Rosalie Gilbert says the situation has Maryland. A good source of informa- approximately fifty members. Since every candidate for the squad will taken -on a grim aspect. tion tells us tha t certain of these se- are to carry have an opportunity to actually participate in some form of debating, Bowen says that someone made a niors of the arranging that appears a certain action part in the just ,~-ho it students from all classes, including the freshman class, are urged to come but There is nothing either good or bad, "grand stand". We wonder have orange- play into real practice. Oh, well, se- Will you makeo it so. thinking out. Bryan never won his reputation as an orator by lounging in his could be now. niors will be selliors. I J3altim01'e News. ade~ room!