Page 159 - Phoenix1999-2000

---~--.~---- COMMENTARY Thursday,ApriI13,2000-Page 7' The Pub: Can't please everyone Sharing thoughts on This whole Pub thing has gone Edward K, Schultheis many angry, hungry people the Pub far enough. And while you might expresses his concerns can take care of at once. a variety of subjects be thinking that why if I am so tired about the Pub's problems. It is because of these restrictions of it, why am I writing about it. I that the Pub gets bogged down so Eric Barry wonders am writing about it because I have meal, and I can say that on occa- much, especially during the fourth whether Westminster is be posted on any sign anywhere come to the realization that no mat- sions it does take awhile, but so far meal hours. I'm sure the workers safe to skateboard. in public. ter what, you are still not going to it has never been an hour ...and trust aren't back there laughing it·up Westminster, is getting pretty satisfy everyone. me, I eat down there enough dur- while saying, "we've been holding Enou-gh about the sign outside ghetto. All these white-trash I read the different viewpoints ing fourth meal hours to warrant this order for 40 minutes, let's see homies trying to be down with the I don't think Personally, and r look over the differing com- my claim. And actually, whenever if anyone notices ...ha-ha." That's the Pub. cares if the Pub employ- "Westside." anyone mentaries and I know that no mat- I do have a problem with my food, just absurd. ees smile arnot. A couple of my friends were ter what happens in the Pub, there such as missing fries, I simply point While I don't think that the Pub I think people want food in skate boarding behind the new will always be someone moaning that out and they take care of it for is perfect, Ialso don't think that it less than an hour, which is impos- Lowe's and SOme thugs in ski and whining about the service or me. is as problematic as many people sible during fourth meal. As for masks held them up at gun-point. the food or the long wait and the While I have looked over the would have you believe. And even the alumnus who visits campus A brand-new video camera list just goes on forever. Ijust don't Pub and Grille Standards Act, I feel if the Pub standards do help speed once a month, obviously he and everyone's jewelry was jacked. doesn't have a full understanding Walch out in Westminster of the "Pub dilemma." cause everybody's seen "Cool as I can tell you Westminster is Ice" and they're trying to be hard, the greatest town in the world, but yep yep. I'm laking the first Benz see what the big deal is. that it isn't going to help anything. up the process, there are still going J only see parts of it at certain ride out of here. Last month, I had my girlfriend I mainly see it as a political state- to be hungry people whining over times, and usually it's during the a contract I am negotiating and her friend up for the weekend ment made by the SGA. If the SGA the "devastating" long 20-minute day. with "Tiger Beat" right now, yep and I decided to give them a taste places these regulations outside the wait on their food. Ask the 5-0 who see things yep. of the Pub's food. Now these are Pub and magically thinks that all I am not condemning the Pub's day in and night out, and they'll prospective students mind you. The the food in the Pub will be piping food or service, nor am I specifi- tell you some messed up stories. There are advantages to look- food was great, the service was hot and speedily served, then they cally praising it. Same applies with people that eat ing 16 after all. I go buycigareues good and the time that it took to have to leave their "fantasy world." I am stating that there is only Pub food every day. and beer and then return the stuff prepare the food was reasonable. The Pub, with all of it's faults so much that the Pub workers can I am sure they have some sto- and say Idon't drink or smoke I In fact, the lady taking our or- and quirks, is still one of the cheap- do at once, and until something ries that would not be allowed to was just doing a SOCiology ex peri- der even joked around with lIS est and most accessible places to about that happens, then I guess ment. about how it looked like we just got eat at and around WMC. I even either suck it up and wait for the Can Norris clear up. It was in fact, very late in the showed it to a couple of prospec- some yourself afternoon. tive students before warning them food or buy pizzas and eat alone microwavable The fact of the matter is that I that they were coming in. But I am in your room. Baltimore's streets? didn't have a problem with the Pub not saying that the Pub is perfect. I think I'd rather sit in the Pub Chris Anastasia discusses new officers and reassigning of- then, and I don't have a problem [am merely stating that the Pub around 11 prn, chatting it up with Baltimore's future under with the Pub now. is mainly student run and while we my friends, and listening to every- Edward Norris. ficers from desk jobs and special Some people say that it takes an would like for it to be a perfect din- one complain about how much time nonenforcement job areas to hour to getxour food during fourth ing establishment, there are only so they have beerl.JWaiting. The city of Baltimore, long street duty, allowing for more po- lice on the street. Quirks: The last true hero considered a haven for high crime more investigations pushing for is also Norris of the police rates while the rest of the nation Many songs have lamented Anne Butler discusses the soda) and the values of capitalist experiences drops in violent force itself. a new "There are no heroes anymore." lack of heroes in today's society. crime, has hired recently. police In a recent survey conducted commissioner of the over They are wrong. One hero remains American culture. Why do I like Pepsi man? Well, Normal1y this would only in which 80 percent on the force 3,000 police officers to free use from these troubled he's just cool, I guess. spark a modicum. of interest from responded, 23 percent believed times. Pepsi man has been the star of sev- J mean, he breaks into people's the public, but this case is differ- that at least a quarter of the force He is the last hope that we have era! commercials, a popular action houses and gives them Pepsi. ent. was engaged in'some form of il- of saving the world from the har- figure line and has even appeared That's just cool in and of itself. This commissioner, Edward legal practice on duty. rowing times that have befallen it. in a video game (Japan's version Plus, he's from Japan, you know T. Norris, made his name as one Norris has come out to openly He has arisen from our corporate of Fighting Vipers). and I'm kinda of a Nihonophile. of the creators of the New York examine these allegations to their culture in much the same way as Pepsiman has rocketed to the Finally, I need a hero in life. I "zero tolerance" policy that has fullest. Also, it has been theorized Superman, Batman, Wolverine, and height of popularity in Japan, and need something to tell me what's caused a drop in crime in New that police training is inadequate Wonder Woman, but he is not the' has found a place in their hearts good and bad, and to be something York, but has also caused many and thus causes citizens to not same as these comic book charac- (which he fills with his carbonated for me to live up to. citizens to bristle at the cities rae- trust the very people sworn to ters. goodness). I think every person does. Af- tics and use of force. protect them. Norris has made No, some may call him a super- But what are Pepsiman's super- ter the whole mess with O.J. Many see the hiring of Norris hero, but he himself would never powers, you ask? Well, they are Simpson, we can't look up to sports a misstep in the fact that the prob- police training a top priority, in hopes of strengthening the bond admit that he is. In fact, he rarely phenomenal because he can sum- heroes anymore, and after Clinton lem New York has had with po- with the community. talks just does his job and leaves. mon Pepsi to wherever he is. I think politicians hardly seem like good He also not from America, he he can also fly or something. role models either. Last year, over 300 people were is from Japan, but he is also far dif- His mission is to "bring refresh- A local teacher was accused of murdered in Baltimore. ferent from the pocket monsters, ment to the world" which seems to pedophilia, and a minister tore a speed racers, and power rangers. consist of breaking into people's stuffed animal in two to show how lice brutality in cases like Amdahl Even with all the things that He is almost unknown in ourcoun- houses and giving them Pepsi. it's evil. The police are beating in- Diallo and Abner Luirna. The Norris and Mayor Martin try and this ls a shame, because we I wish he would break into my nocent people and mother is con- common belief held by those op- 0' Malley have said to earn the have great need of him. donn room and give me Pepsi. Par- victed ofm~rdering her two young posed to the Norris hiring is that I am talking about the one, the ticularly since I don't have any sons. , Norris will bring the same prob- trust of the citizens, people stilI only: Pepsiman l right now. Superheroes are fictional char- lems that have hit New York to have their doubts. I believe that Baltimore must give Norris and Yes, that's right, Pepsiman. So what does Pepsi man repre- acters, and every celebrity seems Baltimore. his system at least a chance .' While we are stuck with the annoy- sent? Well, that's a bit harder I sup- to get involved in at least one ma- While his opponents and Last year, over 300 people ing little girl in the Pepsi advertise- pose. Obviously, he represents jar scandal. naysayers have been quick to were murdered in Baltimore. That ments, the Japanese get Pepsiman Pepsi and "refreshment." Given all these groups that are mention the rather aggressive is nearly a person a day. That is instead. You could also say he battles supposed to be good role models, policing tactics that the New York far lOO staggering a number for What have we done to deserve against alcohol (except that con- we find that they are all tarnished, police have been accused of, the annoying little girl? taining Pepsi) because he does not corrupt or aren't what they appear Norris has not. any city anywhere to stand for. It is my belief that we must Have we scorned Pepsi-Cola in give beer or sake, no our sober hero to be. What he has introduced is a give Commissioner Norris and some fashion? I say we deserve gives only a cool refreshing Pepsi. Pepsi man appears like a saint general attitude as well as an in- his system at least a chance to Pepslman as well! There's also no denying that compared to most of these people. crease in the use of technology help to bring this police force out He should come over and kick Pepsi man says no to drugs, because Is there anything left to believe the annoying little girl's ass. obviously he fights against "Coke." in? Or are kids today going to have and "computer-generated crime of the ashes. statistics" to pinpoint trouble Norris is the first step to en- He wears a silver, red and blue Pepsiman is the epitome of truth to settle for advertising gimmicks spots in the city. Norris proposes full-body suit that covers his face. and justice (as far as it applies to like Pepsiman? sure no more lives are lost due to accelerating the hiring system for the ineffective police force.