Page 108 - ThePhoenix1986-87

Page 10IWestern Maryland College/April 2, 1987 _ Adrian Gawdiak Adrian's Astrology: Look out Aries BLOOM COUNTY Aries(March 21 • April 19) liar and a hypocrit. There is a Several hostile Shiite Muslims great likelihood that you will win break into your room, call a spend the rest of your life in press conference, invite all the prison. major networks and, while Sagitarius(November 22 holding you at gunpoint, force December 21) you to declare over the air that While on a leisurely stroll, you Vanna White is the ann-Christ. will be stopped by several Taurus(April 20 - May 20) misguided Buddhists on a You will be greeted by Martha pilgrimage. They will ask you Quinn at your doorstep. directions to Mecca. You will Thinking Ihat she is only a not know the answer and they mirage. you win ignore her. The will put the curse of 1.000 fleas foUowing morning she will in your underwear, and you will appear on MTV and announce to never reach nirvana. the cable world that you are an ungracious host Gemini(May 21 - June 20) Current cycle highlights business transactions. However, beware of Illen wearing turbans, speaking with Eastern accents, claiming to be native Dundalkians selling oil wells, Cancer (June 21 - July 22) Absolutely nothing will happen this month. Leo (July 23 - August 22) Avoid airports. Leo's run a high risk this month of being abducted by moonie-type cults and Capricorn(December 22 brainwashed into selling flowers. January 19) Virgo (August 23 Avoid relations with Virgo. September 22) Capricorn as well is doomed for The moon is not in a favorable disaster. This month your Logic position for Virgo. Expect test will be graded and returned to disaster: You will mistake your you, your parcms will move to flare gun for a hair dryer and singe Jersey. and your roomate's pit- your face. Your parents will bull will urinate allover your inform you that they have adopted room and rip your girlfriend into 12 Korean refugees all with the steak tips. same name, a stray cat will find Aquarius(January 20 its way into your fish bowl, February 18) swallow your priceless poi and You will receive a letter from throw-up its remains on your bed. Yugoslavia proclaiming you an Libra (September 23 heir to the Serbian throne. October 22) Because you do not understand the Good luck awaits Libra. Your Cyrillic alphabet, you will be house will be blanketed by a unable to read the leuer.or identify Peruvian snowstorm. The the sender so you will throw it government will not fmd out. away, branding it a hoax. Scorpio (October 23 Pisces (February 19 November 21) March 20) You will be summoned to appear In the midst of a sleep walk: you in front of the Congressional will awake naked on the second Hearing Committee concerning floor of Blanche. Security will the Iran arms deal. You will claim immediately arrest you, and throw total ignorance, Colonel Oliver you in the westminster jail drunk Wendel NOM will proclaim you a tank. KME Puzzle Contest Three men walk into a hotel and ask for a room. The manager tells them it will cost $30. Each man pays $10.. Afterwards, the manager realizes he has overcharged them by $5. So he sends the bellboy to their room to refund the $5. The bellboy realizes the $5 will be hard to divide three ways. He keeps $2 as a tip and gives each gentlemen $1. Now each man has paid $9, a total of $27, plus the $2 that the bellboy kept. This makes a total of $29. What happened to !he other dollar? AnSWCl'S should be submitted to KME, P.O. Box 42 by AprillO. KME members are not eligible to win. Congratulations to Bowie Pearre for winning the last KME contest! (Your gift certificate is in the mail.)