Page 17 - TheGoldBug1961-62

The GoJd Bug, Nov. 17, 1961 3 by Margaret Hiller ~'ln daYB .of old, so I've. been told Upon the wild t-nnuier, A ?nan with powder ilL hiB gl~n !Vent forth to hunt a deer. But in these modern days, it goes According to a different plan; A dear with p!)Wde'r on her nose Goes forth to hunt a man!" by I. M. Anonymous Have you ever considered how many people would be lost 011 this campus, had we not a group of "able-bodied" nurses on hand at all times? They range all the way from the chronic hypochondriac to the victim of a tragic accident in- curred while throwing someone ture. in the shower. The local variety of college man, found in most affected individual wooded areas of Western Maryland, can be . of course, be the minor heavy, furry coat, which he dons early in the . He comes into the late spring. These coats vary according to the an aspirin tablet and gold, blue and white, purple and gold, red and a three-day head- and white. In early fall there is a sixth variety, he thinks, because- , an intermedinry stage between the time he his glasses changed gold and begins to wear one of the others. eyes burn; and he can't men are found in bars, back seats of to the doctor's office girls' dormitories, behind and in front of """'o,~a" II'_"',"0 he's afraid to walk on , water bombs, and occasionally under bad ankle. Then too, he are " ever, found behind books or making the may be a bit constipated but you've been waiting for all day. that's understandable since he that perhaps his generation's They are vulnerable to certain feminine lures, such as hasn't been able to eat proper- would enjoy equal fume, high heels, and sweaters. They also [ike blondes, ly for a week because he has rights. When integration does nettes, redheads, making dates two hours before a dance, abscessed gums. And come to occur, Henry believes that peo- butter and mustard sandwiches, beer, foul-smelling pipes, think of it, he hasn't had much pie of the two races will be- skirts, sports cars, button-down collars, Ray Charles, dirty lately-his ears are come familiar with each other sneakers with holes in the toes, their roommates' dates, fraternity infected and the pain and will realize that they have parties, and dumb girls. him. The student many things in common. This A college man is habitually undependable, irresponsible, un- himself in the doc- may gradually result in inter- predictable, unreasonable, insanely jealous, and usually broke. nursing a tOO-degree mar ria g e. In his words, He can be sullen, boisterous, and embarrassingly affectionate in "Where there is life, there is public. No one else can talk quite so much when he is drunk or l" get so drunk so often. He will snore in chapel, shock your 'parents, ruin your repu- tation, date your best friend, smear your lipstick, steal your Lambda Omega Rho KNOUSE CROWN all the animals known to women, only he can utter so heart, and borrow most of your allowance. Yes! After all this, is he still worth hurrting ? Service Station ~~~!et!~7:~~~,::ordS you long to hear: "Hey, you! How'za Perhaps suggestion not to worry. none of us really ap- preciate this extraordinary in- Some fraternities get athletes. Some get stitution dedicated to the serv- ice of ailing students, or maybe brains. This fraternity gets virtually everybody, we do. Have you ever noticed including women. It has fanatically loyal how quickly the infirmary is members in more than 100 countries around BENN'S, INC. populated before a big test---or the world. It has no pin and its only ritual is CARROLL Hamilton House then too, the equivalent speed of evacuation by Homecoming tbe simple act of enjoying Ocee-Cole every PASTRY SHOP Men's and Boys' Wear weekend--even during an epi- single day of the year. demic? Gifts for Ail Occasions Tuxedo Rental Ita namet L 0 R-Lovere of ReIreshment. 7 E. Main St. TI8·7620 (with complete accessories) Join up today. Opposite Post Office $10.00 Visit the SIGN OF GOOD TASTE DECORATED CAKES NORCROSS CARDS WESTMINSTER AVENUE Bottled under authority of The Coco-Colo Company by For All Occasions . , SHOPPING CEKTER BARBERSHOP WESTMINSTER COCA·COLA BOTTLING CO., INC. L-_~ _J L _j '- --' L _j