Page 59 - Scrimshaw1975-76
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Wednesday, December 3, 1975 Scrimshaw .... 3 Attention all Science Studentsl Ever since the first scientific A further series of rules-cor you. example of the application of the It is felt that, at least at present, experiment, men have been really advice to experimenters- The Law of the Lost Inch: reality can be made to conform to Finagle factor, plagued by the unceasing an- has been formulated, They are a In designing any type of con- Einstein's work leading to tagonism of Nature, Only his natural consequence of the first struction, no overall dimension can mathematical theory with relativity was strongly influenced patience, adaptability and four laws reduced to day-to-day be totaled correctly after 4 p.m. reasonable agreement on the basis by the observed facts about the rorebearance have permitted the practice, Friday. of these three John factors. W. Campbell orbit of Mercury. Obviously a However, scientist to learn a few minor facts Experiments must be Corollary I-Uncer the same conditions, if any minor dimen- feels there is a different basic fudge factor was introduced. ab\~~t !~i~lo:r::~o;e~I:~ek~~~e:Sh; ~~~~~~~~~~~~y should all fail sions are given to one-sixteenth of structure behind the Finagle, The photographer's use of a lens this should be so, It's only natural First draw your curves.-then an inch, they cannot be totaled at fudge and factor, diddle he factors. The is "soft-focus" of women when taking over 35 is an portraits Finagle claims, that Nature should be logical and plot the readings. all. characterized by changing the example of the diddle factor. By neat-but it isn't, and the best Experience is directly propor- Corollary 11_ The correct total universe to fit an equation. The blurring the results, photographs teacher of all, Experience, .tums tional to equipment ruined will be self-evident at 9:01 Monday fudge factor, on the other hand, are made to appear to match the out to be just the gradual ac- A record of data is useful-it morning. changes the equation to fit the facts in a far more satisfactory ceptance of Nature's pigheaded- indicates you've been working. Deliveries that normally take universe. And finally, the diddle manner. ness. To' study a subject best, un- one day will take five when you are factor changes things so that the To our knowledge, this is the first Over the years a series of laws derstand it thoroughly before you wai.tog. equation and the universe appear clear enunciation of the scientific have evolved. The laws actually start. When adjusting (or drawing or to fit, without making any real method. All our vast sum of human represent a distillation of ex- In case of doubt, make it sound computing, etc) remember that change in either. knowledge has been derived with perience of thousands of ex- convincing. the eye of the chief inspector tools. Having perimenters, but (until Dr. Finagle Do not believe in miracles-rely (engineer, draftsman, etc.) is For example, the planet Uranus these as the basic for the first time, them in writing came along) they were never on them. more accurate than the finest was introduced to the universe perhaps our children can build recorded for the study and Always leave room to add an instrument. adding two weeks to a when Newtonian laws couldn't be even better futures than the best to match known planetary Alter made edification of younger members of explanation when it doesn't work schedule for unexpected delays, motions. This is a beautiful we envision today. our profession because they had no (This open-door policy is also derivation-no proof. They are known as the Rule of the Way Out.) add two more weeks for the What'shappening' Deaf true because they have always Human Foibles unexpected unexpected delays. December], Wednesday been true. Look into your own The remaining rules outline the In any problem, if you find In:ooA.~l.-4:ooP.M.Art ShowinArt Buildi~ Awareness R:OOP.~1. ChristmasConcertbyWomen'sGlee experience and see if this is not so. human problems that follow from yourself doing an unending amount Club& CollegeSingers of work, be ob- the answer may We are grateful to John W. the above. To some extent they tained by inspection. 8:t5 P.~I, Men's Var!s!y Basketball vI Week Campbell, Jr., editor of Astounding represent man's reaction to Nature Finagle's Creed: Muhlenberg Western Maryland College's 9:00 P.M.-!:OOA.M.GrilleParty s""nsoredb~ Science Fiction, for bringing this and, even more aptly, man's 9:30 Communionin Little.BakerChapeJ Education of the Deaf Department work to our attention, and to the reaction to man Science is Truth-don't be December4. Thursday is setting aside December 7th -14th many readers of that magazine Laws of Revision (Often lumped misled by facts. lG:OOA.M-4:ooP.M.Art Showin Art Building as "Deaf Awareness Week." who collected and contributed into the Now They Tell Us! Law) Finagle's Motto: it will be Smile.-tomorrow events be samples so that others might share First Law: Information Deecmber5. Friday Various include: to a religious held ser- on !O:ooA.M.o4:OOP,M.Art ShowinArt Building campus in, their experience. necessitating a change of design worse. The Finagle Factor On Experiments will be conveyed to the designer !~~n~e;I'~:'ina~::i:~sAj:~ee:::k':t::~~a::l ~C:.~~d~~~~~ ~~~,l~n~~ati~t~! The first four laws are the only after- and only after- the plans A mathematical notation of been one dignified by number. Note the are complete. Finagle's work has however, also there Bridgewater Baker Chapel; an art exhibit in the developed. Here, beauty and simplicity of the First Corollary 1_ In simple cases, seems to be some confusion, ~~~gr~~!~~(~:~:,s V:~:::tba~~s~et:~lk. v; ~i~~r~ ali~~~rn~~i;;:~~~~e~y a~t~~~~ Law. Also note that the remaining where one obvious right way is because two other names enter the three laws refer to men's reactions opposed to one obvious wrong way, picture: fudge and diddle factors E~s~r~~.~I' GoospcllinDecker.slX>nsored~e!~a6%:ur~1~~' s';~::~~a~~~~~~ to Nature-not to Nature itself. it is often wiser to choose the wrong are also used to considerable to be shown from 8 - 10 p.m., First Law: If anything can go way right off. This is one step Friday, Dec. 12 in Decker Hall; wrong with an experiment, it will. ahead of choosing the right way, advantage by scientists and Second Law: No matter what which turns out to be a wrong way, engineers E:~~!r;~\~:i;tr:Xr~ssh~:~~eAr~t:t~il~~~ ~~~~;~Si!:~~;n:~riiec~o 13~nh~~ result is anticipated, there is which has to become a right way. Years ago-when the universe always someone willing to fake it. Second Law: The more in- was relatively easy to un- Uni"ersityof Marylandin GillGym Student Center. Third Law: No matter what the nocuous the revision appears to be derstand-the Finagle factor 6:30 P.~l. Mass in Little Baker result, there is always someone at first, the further its influence consisted of a simple additive 7:t5P.M.ChristmasConcertinBakerwiththe GUest speakers lecturing on the CollegeChoir eager to misinterpret it. will extend and more plans will constant (sotnetimes known as a 9:00 P.M. ~nce in E}!glarCafeteria SDOll topic of deafness include: Dr, Fourth Law: No matter what have to be re-drawn. variable constant) in the form: sored by IFC David Denton, Superintendent of occurs, there is always someone Third Law: .If, when the com- Where any measured variable, 6:t5 P.M ~len's Varsity & JV Basketball a' Maryland State Schools, 7 p.m., l.ebanonValley who believes it happened ac- pletion of a design is imminent, x, could be made to agree with Sunday, Dec. 7; and Rep, Ray' cording to his pet theory. field dimensions are finally sup- theory, x', by simple addition of the TXcember7. Sunday Beck, 6 p.m., Thursday, Dec. II. The Law or-the Too, Solid Goof plied as they actually are-instead Finagle factor, Kf. t1:00A.M.ChapelSErvicein LittJeBaker Both lectures will be held in In any collection of data, the of as they were meant to be-it is Later difficulties couldn't be 3:oo-1:3OP..M.Children'sChristmasParty at Decker Hall. figure that is most obviously always simpler to start all over. solved so easily and so a fudge Churchof Br~threnslX>nsoredby EEl" correct-beyond all need of Fourth Law: Even if it is im- factor Kb, was added, 7:15.P.M. Christmas Concert with College On Sunday, Dec. 14 at 7:~0 p.m. ChOlratBakerChapel checking-is the mistake. possible to assemble a part in- DecemberS. Monday in Big Baker Chapel the all-deaf correctly, still a way will be found Powerful as this adjustment to:OOA.M.·4:ooP.M.ArtShowinArtBuiTding choir from the Christ United Corollary I-No on~ whom you to do it wrong. was, World War II studies in servo 8:ooA.~I,·8:ooP,M,F"leamarketsponsoredby Methodist Church for the Deaf in OEl{ in Grille ask for help will see It, either, Corollary I-It is usually im- theory indicated a need for a still 11:00P.M·JQ:ooP.M. OpenSmokersPQnsored Baltimore City will perform in CoroJtar.y I1-Everyon.e w~o practical to worry beforehand stronger influence. The didd1e by ARTin Cafeteria stops by With unsought advice Will about interlere.nces-il YOU have factor, Kd, was born and made to ueceobers.juesce, 't;:~!~t~~:~~r S~i to:OOA,M.-4:OOP.M.ArtShowin Art Building ~~~t;o~w~~~ , see it immediately. , someone will make multiply the quadratic term. 6:15P.M.ARTBanquetin Little Frock's the Christ United Methodist, is remembered lor his inspired ministry to the deaf community, A - biographical film written and produced by the Total Com- munications Laboratory of WMC and Dr. L. Earl Griswold, chair- man of the sociology department, will be shown, followed by a lecture to be delivered by Rev. Foxwell, Jr. entitled "God is Deaf." Freedom of worship An inmate in the Wyoming State Prison has filed suit in Federal court in Salt Lake City contending that his freedom of religion is being violated because he can't worship the Devil according to the dictates of his conscience, The suit charges that the prison, which provides equipment for, other religious services, hasn't provided him with a nude woman for use as an altar, black robes with hoods, black-and- white candles, a bell, chalice, elixir says he would be willing to com- promise on the nude woman and the sword, which are not allowed in prison, and make do with an in- flatable plastic mannequin and a blackboard pointer.