Page 19 - Contrast1971Fall

really wish you could think of the things she does. She's so good, but you
couldn't copy her idea ... exactly, just use it as an inspiration. Sidney's problem
is that she gets an idea, a great one, but it would be so hard to do that she would
only half-finish it. She tried to carve a pineapple once and it was so tedious she
only got one-third of it complete. It was gonna look great, everyone could tell,
but she gave her an F because it wasn't finished in time. You think that's why
she didn't like Sid. As a matter of fact she completely ignored her because her
job was education, which had' nothing to do with art, but simply meant anyone
who produced got along. Elsie's buck teeth got her better grades than Sid's nice
ass got her. If only she could get a little self-confidence, Sid could do some
amazing stuff. She'd been accepted to a fine art school but you and she both
knew she wouldn't make it there either. Kim would make it big there but Sid

wouldn't because her imagination was impractical.
Gary is next to you squooshing his sloppy clay through his fingers as he

makes a fist around it. It.bubbles and cracks and you and he start laughing until
she comes around and tells you about air bubbles, wheeze, in your clay will
make it explode during the firing stage. And not only will that ruin your work,
but small peices and chips will often stick to and become bonded to someone
else's piece of sculpture ... So .. ~you wouldn't want anybody else's cateless-
ness ruining your hard work, now would you Gary? It didn't do any good to tell
her she was a stifljng, full of shit teacher, though, cause she just answered you
with a bunch of Christian bullshit and you lost your point. So you and Gary
waited til she walked away and then continued in a slightly subdued form. But
neither of you could decide what to make. Gary suggested making a penis and
even started on it, but then she came walking back and he quickly scrunched it
up into the general mass once more. But it was good for a laugh anyway.

Y0U think serlouslv about possibly making something really ... nice, as
she would say. Something common but well-done, being very slow and careful.
Then after she said what a nice job and how good it was that you were applying
yourself and that Gary should follow your example, after all that crap, just
denting in the sides and letting it collapse on itself, seemingly becuase of some
defect, but really because you made it that way. A nice trick of illusion. You
could blame the clay itself when defending yourself against her and she would
blame you for it. But maybe you would really use your imagination and' make
something of your own for once. Christ, that would shock her, and you too
because you aren't really sure if you can do something good. You've always
~een afraid to try. As it is now you can always say you weren't really trying,

then. you wou Id have no excuse.