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or any of those fat-cat corporations
run by money-loving, Wall Street swindlers.
No, College Kid only shops at Goodwill.
Way better selection.
Makes for that perfect,
"I'm a poor college student living modestly" look.
But first,
College Kid had to look up directions on his iPhone.
College Kid cares about a lot of stuff.
No, he's passionate about a lot of stuff.
Like pointing out police brutality
(There's this video of a cop hitting a guy dressed as an aborted fetus at
"Occupy 7-1 1")
and endangered Brazilian pygmy tamarins-
Did you know that every year, only 9 out of 10 tamarins will live to mat-
ing age due to a decreasing number of Brazilian crickets which depend
on rare wildflowers to survive, but evil businessmen are harvesting these
flowers to make magenta dyes for their tee shirt corporations!?
That's why College Kid never wears magenta,
except on "Wear Magenta for Vladimir Cheskoyvski Day"
(You've probably never heard of Vladimir Cheskoyvski.
He's only the author of the most beautiful Russian poetry ever).
College Kid's taste in movies is legit.
College Kid loves staying up until 5 a.m. watching foreign movies-
sorry, films.
He's also such a (self-proclaimed) nerd,
taking a sudden interest in
Dr. Who (Exterminate! LOL)
And ... Star Trek (Picard is totally better than Kirk. Ican tell. I've seen
an entire episode).
College Kid doesn't ever eat breakfast.
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