Page 26 - Contrast1971Spring

One morning in particular came to mind. A particularly vicious morning in December
near the end of the war. I had drawn guard and had suffered considerably in those long, cold,
hours before the dawn. There was another reason that made those hours crawl by even more
spitefully: before sunup, that very day, we were to move in and crush resistance in a recently
bombed city. It was a task I hated much more than guard. The danger, the terrifying chance that
lurked on the other side of every wall (J caught this slip and was momentarily drawn out of the
past). Behind every comer lay death, with every step ones life depended on reflexes and the
sharpness of his eyes. It depended also on the uncontrollable factors like the aim of a sniper
never seen, or the path of a bullet never heard. It was these things that I measured constantly,
obsessivelythat morning in December.

The sky was a dark blue, dawn was still an hour away, when we filtered over the ridge
and down through the field to the town. There were no sounds, no signs of movement, no trace
of life other than ourselves to be seen. Wemet no resistance to our entrance to the city. Indeed
after we arrived we met little enough. It was those sporadic flurries of gunfire, supplied mostly
by snipers, that shattered the silence and made each of us more alert, uneasy. Thinking back
to that morning in April I think I sensed satisfaction that my envolvement with this mental
reconstruction had drawn my mind from my predicament. It was a subtle, subconscious hint
though, for a conscious thought would have returned me to reality.

Then a particular incident came to mind, three incidents actually, but three which oc-
curred as a single one. It was inevitable that they should for they had come to me many times
since they happened with substantially less preparation than relivingthe entire day which held
them. It was in the city that morning in December, shortly after dawn. It looked as though all
resistance was ended and our nerves had responded accordingly. I was scouting a street, walking
close to the building on my right. Suddenly, when rounding a comer, I came face to face with
one of the enemy. I'm sure he was every bit as startled as was I, for the look in his eyes ...
I'll never forget that as long as I live. The absolutely terrified look in those eyes froze me as
I'm sure my own countenance froze him. I'm positive we both reacted in less thana second
but it seemed like we stood there motionless for an eternity, staring, beholding the fear in each