Page 30 - Contrast2009

i·getY()t1 ioe

ed JaSl;ler

I should be sick tomorrow, I say. But tomorrow I end up

going to work anyway. I get out of bed fully-clothed and

roll into my coat 'at 5: 30 in the morning. I fight myself

and my responsibilities to my employer ,while my body

automatically takes me downstairs and Oyt int~ 17 degrees

"Fahrenheit of pitch black morning gushing into I\IYface and

,eyes.'

At,dispatch one round man talks to a woman of similar

build. My girlfriend, she lost a whole lotta weigh~ this

past odd mon t h or 'so just by eating better and drinking more

wat~r, the woman says. Yeah, I heard that you really don't

neednodiet'or nothing to lose weight, that's what I heard"

that yo~ 'just drink water and you eat what you want, the man

·says. I stare directly at the digital clock reading 6:05,

trying to look sleepier than I am.

This is not,a job I plan to have for the long haul.

There are hun~reds of other bus aides and bus drivers. Any

employer reference' I ,'getwill be of the form letter variety

from,the State government. I am not particularly needed.

Most of my kids are pret~y high-functioning. I've only~come

to work because I told my kids I'd be there. Yesterday three

of the kids independently asked me, and I said yes, I will

"definitely be here tomorrow. I was thrilled that it mattered

to-them.

The 'woman at the window calls me over and tells me I'm

going out on bus 308 this morning instead of bus 312 because

308's aide couldn't make it in. The driver is waiting on

me to, leave" so I head out. Fr~eezing from the 30 foot walk

to the bus" I sit in the Drown'tombstone seat with my aims

and shot\lders squeezing'my ribcage. We have some kids for

Ch rf st i ana High School first run and they can buckle' their

own~seat belts, second run is West Park Elementary, and thei

'might need ,'some'help, and then the third is real little,'

kids to Brader Elementary and they go in the car seats, the

,driver tells me.

The hrst ru~ is nothing. A few sleepy teenagers sit near

~6e iront.l~wo brothers sit in the back, and I let them

wi thout fear for the.-eme rqericy exit'., ,

,, Ourfir~t pickup for West Park is a lit~le black kid

,dressed in his pajamas, boots, and a winter coat. We turn

into a trailer park and pick up a little white kid who

is also dressed in his pajamas, boots, and a coat. The

white kid sits next to the black kid, and they both laugh